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BAD Idea – Really BAD Idea

October 2, 2011

Following in the skyscraper heels of the various “Real” Housewives of wherever… The latest really awful idea to hit the military community.   The Real Housewives of the Military (San Diego).

We’ve been fighting the stereotypes for years; trying to educate our civilian friends that we aren’t either the perfectly manicured and coiffed spouse who lunches,  nor are we the bar hopping, bed hopping tramps that Hollywood portrays.

Nor is every Housewife in New Jersey a screeching harridan, with big hair and bad makeup, not every Housewife in Atlanta lives in a mega mansion, etc. etc.   These “Real Housewives” shows, that are overdramatized hysteria, in which bad behavior is rewarded by more air time and the dubious fame of being plastered over the supermarket tabloids, do nothing to dispel these stereotypes.

The first paragraph of their request for contributors  started my eye twitching .  The “behind every man” bit is on the sexist side, wouldn’t you say?  Behind?  How about “BESIDE every man”…  Because for most of the military families that I know , the spouses are partners.    “A Relationship with the enlisted”… excuse me?  That’s simply bad grammar, as well as leaving out a sizeable portion of the military population.

You fell in love with a man in uniform, in fact, you’re married to the military. Behind every man stands a great woman, none more so than the man in service to his country. Military wives will celebrate these unsung heroes that are also making the sacrifice, spending their nights alone, holding down the fort on home soil.

Doron Ofir Casting is recruiting a group of extraordinary women who share the joys and burdens that come along with choosing a relationship with the enlisted. If your life as a military wife is worthy of being shared with millions you should apply.

This brand new DocuSeries offers the unprecedented opportunity to document your lifestyle as you navigate the complicated journey of being in a relationship with or married to the military. From deployments to homecomings, enlisted men to officers, the newly engaged to recently divorced, Military Wives aims to celebrate the true story behind love and life with the military.

Now then, who really thinks they will “celebrate the true story”?  show of hands here please…. Yeah, me neither.  Do you really think that our real lives will be shown?   Now, we understand they are in the business of creating drama,  and there are moments of excruciating drama in our lives.  But do you really want a camera in your face when you are getting bad news?  Do you want one in your business during your weekly call with your spouse downrange?  Do you want one shadowing you when you are greeting them or when you are saying goodbye?  And do we need any manufactured drama between wives of a unit?  There’s enough of that to go around already (like the knockdown dragouts that are periodically reported in commissaries and PXs, or the nastiness that we hear about in the FRGs)

And how would you like to tell your spouse’s CO that you are going to be on TV.  How do you think this will tie in with OPSEC restrictions?

This would be such a giant step backwards!  Military spouses have started major support charities and networks, Military Spouses drafted and worked to pass the MSRRA, changes to MyCAA; we are advocates for our community; we work to improve the lives of our families and community.   I, for one, do not want to see those old stereotypes reinforced.  I, for one,  hope that this does not make it our screens.


12 Comments leave one →
  1. October 2, 2011 9:36 pm

    UUUUGH. Fail.

  2. October 2, 2011 11:59 pm

    Agreed. This could only be a disaster. I do not see anyone in mainstream Hollywood doing our story justice.

  3. October 3, 2011 5:49 am

    Total train wreck. I also have to wonder about the careers of the military members whose spouses participate. The military is already in our business more than they should be, this will only make it worse. There are just so many other issues that go with a show like this. Hopefully someone will grow a brain and shut it down before it airs citing OPSEC.

  4. Stacy Fiore permalink
    October 3, 2011 7:18 am

    This is a horrible, horrible idea. I can only hope that this idea stays an idea and never hits TV.

  5. October 3, 2011 12:05 pm

    I agree that this is a horrible idea. The casting asks if you are “up all night worrying or up all night partying” and also says they want six brazen women. Yeah, they aren’t looking for our stories, they are looking for drama, drama, drama. I can’t see how something like this is allowed because of OPSEC.

  6. October 3, 2011 8:32 pm

    Um, yeah. Faily McFail.

  7. October 3, 2011 9:22 pm

    They should stick to Lifetime’s Army Wives show and call it a day. The Real Military Wifes sounds like an Epic Fail. Cause theres like 5 stereotypes for Milspouses, which would they pick? And what about the oddballs like me? How would they portray Females in the Military? As a bunch of homewrecking whores when the “real good women” are the Milspouses? I’m sure they’ll love the whole “boat boo” thing that goes on. I think Carrier was ok. I mean, did they focus on two or three specific rates? Yes. But it was tastefulish. But that was on PBS, so of course it wasn’t made to be trashy. I kinda forsee this being a outlet for the “reunion porn” Snarky Navy Wife talked about once. As for them looking for drama? Just move them into the barracks for a Training command or out on a boat for a couple of weeks. Holee Shiiiiiit. As my RDC would say.

  8. October 4, 2011 4:30 am

    As a former enlisted wife, no this is not good, for they only want enlisted men”s wives, that is not the only ones who do so much, now it’s time to stand for men that marry enlisted women??? They have to do the same thing the wives do?? That’s why we were called dependents and spouses??? Duh?

  9. October 4, 2011 4:31 am

    and what about officers wives?? are they tooo special to be humiliated???

  10. kimba permalink
    October 5, 2011 11:07 am

    Susan – I suspect they simply don’t know enough about the military to know that there’s a difference. Even worse, I’m sure that as soon as they get it figured out, they’ll find a way to pit the two groups of wives against each other.

  11. slightlysaltyspouse permalink
    October 21, 2011 10:12 pm

    Such a bad idea on all counts. They will just sensationalize things, exaggerate things and put a bad spotlight on all around.

  12. December 12, 2011 10:39 am

    Oh golly. Choosing to participate in “reality” TV has got to be on the all time list of worst ideas ever. I even question the appropriation of the homecoming shows. I have first hand seen the confusion and adjustment that occurs when a long deployed spouse comes home and a young child needs to readjust to the return. I’ve seen the heartbreak in the Airmen’s faces when they realize the baby they left is now a toddler that doesn’t recognize them. Here’s hoping saner heads prevail.

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